Mindful Movement

Recovering from a recent injury, I asked myself why I was doing what I was doing.  I had intended to run 1,000 miles this year, complete some kind of race every month (one being another marathon) while working full time and going to school online.  Six months in, I realized my activity has been taking me away from myself and I’m losing connection with my soul.

My school studies are challenging on an emotional level because in order to be prepared to help others, I must address my own issues.  I’m allowing myself to do this work, to feel what I feel when I feel it.  It is not a coincidence that the area of my back I recently injured is in the location of my heart chakra, a place that has refused to move for some time.  I do believe there is connection between our minds, our experiences, and the tissues in our body.  I have learned that by listening to my body, I can discover areas of my mind that need attention.

I am embarking on a new journey of daily mindful movement in the form of Adamantine Yoga taught by a local guru starting Monday.  I have a fire in my belly and desire to share my gifts with anyone who wishes to receive them.  I have no plans to stop running at this time and I will continue to support others in their running goals but I am being called in a different direction in this time of my life.

This morning, I went a little over nine miles with people I love.  I ran with my heart until I didn’t want to run anymore, until my breath was labored instead of deep.  Then, I walked until I wished to run again.  With each step, I was aware of the energy flowing through my veins.  The day was beautifully cloudy, warm and humid.  The forest was green and wildlife filled the air.  I am grateful for what my body can do.

I must take care of my body, it’s the only place I have to live (Jim Rohn).

 

From my heart to yours,

Thanks for reading

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Grieving Maya

The work of Maya Angelou changed my worldview in the darkest time of my life to date.  That woman lived life.  She experienced it, she felt it, she wrote about it.  Her work transcended gender, race and social economic status.  Her words will live on for decades to come.

In the wake of her death, I’m working on my undergrad in Behavioral Science.  I’m taken back to memories of what I typically refer to as “before”.  Before I woke up.  Before I allowed myself to be me.  Before I met my soul.

These days, I have given up on the idea that I have it all together.  I wake up each day, do my best, go to sleep, and repeat.  I have learned that some questions have no answers.  I have learned that time passes, life goes on and nothing lasts forever.  I choose to not feed fear about when the next “bad” thing may happen and instead, embrace the “now”.  I sometimes genuinely feel more than one conflicting emotion at the same time and that is okay.  There are no “good” or “bad” feelings, there are just feelings.

I’ve learned that no matter how skinny, how fast, how smart or how attractive one may be, it’s never enough to feel valuable.  Self worth comes from inside.  It is a matter of the heart.  It has nothing to do with marital status, pant size or pace.  If you have breath, you have value.  Period.

Thank you, Maya, for helping me start my journey.  I will cherish your words for the rest of my life.